Have you ever considered or owned up to the fact that you may be your own worst enemy when it comes to achieving your goals?
While this question may bring some truths to the forefront of your mind when it comes to self-sabotage, it’s also important that we acknowledge the external social constructs we are forced to act within as well. While self-sabotage is certainly a major issue in dampening your chances of succeeding at achieving what you want, the social constructs of staying within the norm and adhering to social expectations can sometimes be too powerful to overrun.
When we consider the fact that as humans we are all within a very small percentage of each other genetically, it’s easy to assume that perhaps we all have the same equal opportunity to be great or to succeed above the ‘norm,’ whatever that may be, but the reality is that social equality is not apparent in today's society and it more than likely never will be either.
That’s a tough reality to swallow…
The fact that some social groups may just never be given the opportunity to even have the opportunity to be better, let alone equal.
It may be scary, however, it is the reality we live in. But here is another reality…
If we understand our social restrictions and acknowledge the hurdles we need to face, once we do this, is our success or failure then to be blamed on our social constructs or should it be on the individual?
Everyone is happy to preach their personal development when they succeed despite adversity, however, no one is willing to own up and acknowledge their personal downfalls in failure.
Why is that?
Why are we happy to preach how far we have come when we succeed but not acknowledge how little we tried to get out of the social hole we were born in when we fail?
Is it pride?
Or do we realise that despite the adversity we were born into, our ability to succeed at achieving our goals has a hell of a lot to do with our own attitude and our own commitment to attempting to achieve success?
So yes you may come from a low socio-economic family and perhaps you were raised on poor nutrition, a lack of support to exercise and an ingrained mindset to not enjoy exercise, but that should never define you.
The actions you make as an individual now, in an effort to shape the individual you wish to be in the future is what defines you.
Your ability to fight, to learn and to survive is what defines you.
Not who you were, but instead who you are becoming is what defines you! And so I challenge you… grab a pen and paper and then continue to read on:
At the bottom of your page go through the following 3 scenarios:
- Write down the 3 factors that are holding you back right now
- Acknowledge the 3 factors that have held you back in the past
- Recognise the adversity you will have to face in order to succeed in the future
Now, with a highlighter, cross them all out with one big consistent line from the bottom left portion of the list all the way to the top right-hand portion and finish it with an arrow pointing upwards about 2-3cm above your final words.
I want you to use a highlighter so you can still read the words, but the symbolism of crossing them out remains the same.
As you’re doing this, acknowledge them all one more time and consciously begin to cross them out as hurdles and instead recognise them as small speed bumps you will most definitely drive right over.
Now fold these restrictions down and behind the paper so that only the arrow is visible above the crease line at the bottom of the page and the adversities you faced are hidden.
At the top of the new freshly clean page write down the following:
- 3 long-term personal development goals
- 3 long-term performance goals (can be physique related)
- 3 long-term professional goals
Draw a line under those and then write 3 short-term goals for each long-term goal that you will need to achieve prior to achieving your long-term goals.
This is your pathway to success
You acknowledge your adversities, mentally prepare for your long-term goals and recognise the steps you need to take in order to be successful at achieving those with shorter term goals.
Put these goals up somewhere where you can acknowledge them daily and when you need that slight reminder of how hard you need to commit to these goals to beat the adversities you may have, flip down the creased page and read the hurdles that are in front of you once again.
Acknowledge the adversities but do not let them hold you back
Fold the page back again and follow the path that the arrow is guiding you to... it's guiding you to your goals!
Move forward and accept the challenges ahead, because success is realistically your choice.
The reality is, that unless you are prepared to take your chances without fear of failure, you will never truly reach your limits.
Don’t just challenge the social constructs you live within, but instead challenge yourself.