You’re Failing and it’s Your Fault!

by DeanMcKillop 2432 views Lifestyle

You’re Failing and it’s Your Fault!

Why is it that some people always appear to be doing life easy, while others appear to always be doing life tough? Is it merely just a misinterpretation of what their life is really like or are there genuinely winners and losers by definition?

I have always been a firm believer in creating your own destiny as some people call it. Personally I prefer to look at it as creating your own success as I’m not a spiritual person, but regardless, how you determine that success is really up to you as an individual, as there is no 1 true meaning behind what success really is.

However the question I always ask myself is, did I create my own success or was it handed to me?

What I mean by that is…
Is my perceived success a representation of the life I was born into or did I personally work to achieve it?

I think it is absolutely necessary to note that we are not all created equal, at least not in the sense of what we are provided with as a child anyway.

  • We are brought up in a community our parents chose.
  • Our income and financial security as a child is controlled by what our parents can provide.
  • Our schooling is determined by our sociocultural or socioeconomic status depending on our family’s financial and geographical position.
  • Racial segregation or expectation may limit opportunity.

In essence, our beginning to life is a direct representation of our parents, and likewise theirs was a direct representation of their parents too.

These are factors we have no control over - Well at least initially anyway


The reality is, we cannot choose our parents, we cannot choose our ethnicity and nor can we choose our geographical location as a child. All of which, play a major role in the beginnings of our lives. Did you know that your socioeconomic status is one of the biggest determinants of your health?

Coach Lizzy talks about it a little in her article.

The fact is, some people are born into less than fortunate circumstances…

And unfortunately their chances or the likelihood of them getting out of their families idea of normality in order to break the trend is hard. 

BUT… it is not an impossibility despite being extremely difficult.

There are some things we all have control over

You can choose your commitment to obtaining more knowledge, your commitment to being open minded and your commitment to holding yourself accountable.

These 3 things I believe are what are holding a lot of people back:

Open mindedness

All too often people want to blame their environment, their situation or someone else when it comes to personal or professional hardship. It’s far easier to shift the blame, there is no denying that, but shifting the blame doesn’t allow you to learn and improve.

Shifting the blame allows you to forget and move on… after all, it wasn’t your fault right?

You didn’t lose the 10kg before Christmas like you wanted to?

Well ask yourself these 3 questions:
  1. Did you attempt to learn more behind what factors are involved in achieving fat loss through exercise and nutrition?
  2. Were you open to new information or open to change?
  3. How accountable were you when it came to change?

You see, the problem with having a goal without knowledge, open mindedness and accountability is, that there are too many ways for you to fail.

  • How are you supposed to lose fat if you don’t even know what steps it entails to achieve it?
  • How are you supposed to succeed when you aren’t willing to change habits that have failed you in the past?
  • What makes you accountable to change and will you own your own decisions as opposed to passing them off?

While some of us may have been born into more socioeconomically and sociogeographically positive environments, it does not mean we are limited to what our environment provides us.

What does limit us in achieving success is self-belief

I’m sure losing 10kg may be a great achievement for you, but could you lose 15kg?

Or perhaps you think earning a $100 000 salary is a goal… well why cant you earn $250 000?

If there is one thing my business coaches taught me when I worked with them, was to never set a limit of your level of success.
It doesn’t matter if its financial, personal or professional success, what limits you is your self-belief and your ability to foresee how far you can take something you are passionate about.

You can’t achieve what your mind cannot conceive!

So here is the harsh reality

The only place excuses will get you is back to where you began.

Back to the place you are trying to break free from.

We don’t learn from making excuses, we learn from being accountable, owning our decisions and gaining more knowledge from our mistakes so that next time when we are faced with the same adversity, we can rise above it and achieve what we set out to.

You fail because you choose to accept second best.

Ask yourself this…Have you ever really tested or found your limits?

The scary thing about finding your limits is it requires us to potentially achieve failure.  The problem with this is, all too often people are too scared to fail in their attempt to succeed.

The greatest performers in all avenues of life always say they built their success on the back of failure.

You and I are no different…

If you want success in life, business or even weight loss, the key to success is not in your ability to work harder but instead in your ability to work smarter.

Find your passion, up skill your knowledge, be open to change and ensure you are accountable to your own expectations.

Your success is your choice. Choose to walk the path on which you will succeed. 



Exercise Scientist

I completed my Exercise Science Degree at the University of QLD and have worked in the fitness industry for over 8 years, including a short stint at the Brisbane Broncos in 2010 as a student. I also hold my Level 2 Strength and Conditioning Coach accreditation (ASCA) and have competed in 1 bodybuilding season, placing 2nd at the IFBB u85kg Nationals.

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